From time to time, just when things seem to be going swell, life throws us curveballs. They take us by surprise, they throw us off-balance. While it’s tempting to wallow in self pity and mope, that won’t benefit us in the long run.
Without going into details, this is the reason I haven’t written much. For a few days, disappointment and anger took over. Then I snapped out of it. Today, I’ll share the mindset. Hopefully it’ll help readers get their lives back together.
#1 I can own the setback or let it crush my spirit.
No way will the latter happen! Sure, I can choose to turn into a bitter old woman but why let it ruin my life? Wouldn’t it be better to use the lesson learnt to be a stronger and more determined person who knows what she wants?
#2 A setback won’t last forever.
Certain unpleasant situations are permanent, some aren’t. What is within our control is our own response to it. We can decide not to let these setbacks affect our psyche and confidence forever. We can take steps to improve ourselves so that such setbacks won’t happen to us again.
#3 Use the setback to fuel your goals.
This ties in to #1. The setback can make or break us. There’s no way in hell I’ll let a situation break me. So I thought about it, remembered the lesson and used it to define goals and objectives to achieve what I want. And what I want is to not allow such a setback to happen again.
So…….. what have I been doing? : )
Work on exercise regime.
Sweating it out always helps me feel better afterwards. After receiving compliments, I threw myself into reading up more about what I can do to improve my current workout regimen.
Being more aware.
The first time a similar setback occurred in the past, I was overwhelmed with grief. I wasn’t conscious of what happened to me and around me. This time, I was better prepared.
Instead of being consumed by sadness, I observed how others treated me. People were still nice. They still treated me with respect. Instead of being blind to all this, I allowed it to help me feel better.
Set my boundaries, reinforce what I want.
Compromise is generally good as it helps avoid conflict. However, there needs to be reciprocation. I realised during this time that I’d taken too many steps back and it wasn’t getting me anywhere. In fact, I was increasingly unhappier.
If another party refuses to back down and expects us to give in all the time, it won’t work either. So what do we do? We can choose to try and change an unpleasant situation and be increasingly frustrated and disappointed as a result or we can cut our losses and walk away.
I walked. And that proved to be a really good thing.
No more shit!
Yup. In summary, this is what happened. Everyday, I read helpful tips so I know what to do in future. It’s gotten easier and I feel better now. I’ve become more aware about the progress rather than let negativity consume me.
With this batch of lemons, I’m gonna make damn bloody good lemonade!
Wishing you fun,