Weight stigma while dating

The body positive community says that fat people are oppressed and encounter weight stigma everywhere.  Fat people miss out on job opportunities, they receive lower wages than their healthy weight counterparts, they receive poorer service quality and they find it difficult to date.

I spoke about the job opportunities, lower wages and poorer service quality before.  Today, I’ll tackle the dating bit.  I do acknowledge that it’s a lot harder for fat people to find a date and they face rejection a lot more often than those of a healthy weight.  They’re frequently insulted about their appearance and have to put up with disrespect.

I don’t agree with the way some douches treat them.  If they’re not attracted to fat people, let them down nicely.  Even if they need to mention that it’s due to their weight, it’s fine.  What is unacceptable is calling them all sorts of demeaning names and downright humiliating them.


On the flip-side, there’re times when the fat people reveal the very reason they find it so difficult to score dates.  They have ridiculously high standards when they themselves can’t bring as much to the table.  Asking to be treated with respect as a human being is 1 thing (and that’s reasonable).  Demanding the skies when they aren’t that much of a catch is quite another.

There’re reasons the hot dudes and dudettes that these fat people want to date won’t consider them.  Like what I stated in the entry about my fat exes, our lifestyles just didn’t gel.  Eventually, I felt trapped in a relationship and life I didn’t want.  It was then that I wrote off dating fat men.

The same goes for fat women.  Yes, it seems insulting to them that they have to lower their standards.  But they need to do some self-examination.  What else can they bring to the table, besides their looks?  What can they do to encourage attraction from the opposite sex?

Food for thought.

Wishing you fun,



2 thoughts on “Weight stigma while dating

  1. Maybe it’s my weird taste in men (I always go for the geeky nice guys.The geekier the more attractive in my eyes) ,but dating hasn’t been super hard for me..that being said I never had unrealistic standards. The biggest ones were that the guy is kind, treats me respectfully and is intelligent.
    I agree with you on the lifestyle habits part. As an obese woman who is struggling to break away from her toxic habits, lose weight and live a healthy lifestyle I find it difficult when around family. Eating habits and how active you are can be influence by who you are with. When I am with my smaller friends I tend to be more conscious of my food habits versus when I’m with my family eating bad and sitting on the couch are all too easy to do.


    • I’m glad to hear that. I feel sad for the women who have difficulty dating and, worse, hearing about them being humiliated by douchebags.

      I hope this blog gives you tips. I did shed 10 kilos in 3 months. If you want, do drop me an email at mymanandme03@gmail.com and we can take it from there.

      My advice will be free as I only wish to help others. All the best!


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