Fish curry gathering!

The MRS gang – Jasmine, XiaoQi, Sugen, Felix and I – caught up over an incredibly tasty and filling lunch!  Sharon couldn’t join us as her dad was in town and we missed her, but we had a great time nonetheless.  It’s lovely to sit down to a delicious meal together and what better to eat than fish curry? 😀

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With muh laydehs.

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With muh boys.

It was great to see them again.  We’re pretty tight, especially Felix and me.  He’s like a big brother and always looks out for me whenever he can.  I appreciate that.  Sugen was charming as usual and gave me a nice long hug after we haven’t seen each other for months!

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We caught up at Ocean Fish Curry.  They have branches in Central and East Singapore which are crowded with hungry customers salivating at the thought of delicious, spicy curry gravy and fragrant white rice!  Fortunately, Jas went the day before and reserved a table for us 😛

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We had the famous curry, veggies, fried fish and otah.  I forgot to photograph the prawn paste chicken, but it was sooooooo good, I had multiple pieces 😛

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Hungry hungry Felix, tucking tucking in!

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If we’re good people, we won’t lack company whenever we want it.  I suppose people like Amanda have to do many things alone because people don’t look forward to spending time with her as much.  It’s not her size but her personality which sucks.

Still, we had a lovely time.  Looking forward to more gatherings! : )

Wishing you fun,

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Ms Plus Size Singapore

A Singaporean woman, known as Tan Si Mi, won the Ms Top Of The World Plus Size contest held in Latvia on 9 June 2016.  The pretty lass beat contestants from many other countries to clinch the coveted title amongst the most confident of large women.  Here she is, flashing a brilliant smile, just after she was crowned the winner.

Singapore woman wins world's contest for plus-size beauties

I have mixed feelings about this.  Whilst it’s wonderful to see a heavy woman who’s confident instead of being depressed and grouchy, obesity isn’t something that should be celebrated.  Although our obesity rate is climbing at a far slower pace than the US, the UK, Australia and New Zealand (coincidentally where fat acceptance and body positivity is most rampant), nevertheless, it is still rising and we shouldn’t be complacent.

Still, it’s good to note that despite her size, Ms Tan’s hair is immaculate and her makeup flawless.  During the contest, she wore glamourous dresses instead of frumpy potato sacks.  And that smile is definitely worth a million bucks!  Everybody can choose to look and feel great!

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Ms Tan was quoted as saying that she’d tried everything to lose weight but simply couldn’t.  It’s the same liner that every body positive activist uses ad nauseum.  My cousin-in-law and beautician also said the same thing, until they realised that they’d been going about it wrong all the while.

Perhaps what is lacking in Ms Tan’s – and many heavy women’s – case is lack of awareness.  They didn’t know where to start.  Their only alternatives were to join Weight Watchers, try weight loss pill and tea after weight loss pill and tea and drastically cut their calories.  No wonder they could never keep the weight off even if they did lose it.

I just hope that Ms Tan finds a way to shed the weight eventually.  Winning a competition is great; congratulations to her.  However, it isn’t something to be proud of and is far from an achievement.  I hope fat acceptance and body positivity won’t be too acceptable here.

Wishing you fun,

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Size 0 = anorexic?

If you have the time, browse through the comments section of online body positive articles, Reddit and Voat.  When I’ve had a long day at work, reading about what people say makes for very entertaining me time : )  Currently, body positivity is all the rage.  Every other day, there’s an article, blog post or meme being circulated, telling women to love their bodies.

Nothing wrong with that, of course.  It’s good for women to develop confidence.  This is the only way they can weather some of the blunt comments made about their physiques by those who don’t appreciate it.  After all, if we post pictures on social media platforms with very high traffic, we should be prepared that not everybody will find our figures attractive.

What is most amusing, however, is when the obese community try to brainwash men by saying that fat bodies in the media are more attractive than ‘anorexic size 0 models’.  It hurts many slender ladies who happen to wear a size 0 and below.  I still believe that nobody can make us feel shame unless we know we haven’t put in enough effort and lack confidence.  But many women haven’t gotten to this stage yet.  Fair enough.

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What I can do is correct the perception that people who maintain a size 0 body are anorexic.  The food I typically eat is shared in this blog and the sheer quantity will send true anorexia or bulimia sufferers screaming in fear.  I’d also written about slender vs anorexic bodies before.

It’s not slim women’s fault that men prefer to see a waist instead of folds upon folds of mountainous flesh.  It’s not slim women’s fault that men drool over Victoria’s Secret models.  Smaller and larger women have their different sets of admirers.  Why be so greedy and want the whole pie?

I feel sorry for the women who expressed their pain at being skinny shamed but are flippantly told that being skinny shamed isn’t as bad as being fat shamed.  Their feelings of inadequacy are just as real as those who’ve been called shamus, landwhales and hambeasts.

I wish they could have more confidence in themselves.

Wishing you fun,

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Weight stigma while dating

The body positive community says that fat people are oppressed and encounter weight stigma everywhere.  Fat people miss out on job opportunities, they receive lower wages than their healthy weight counterparts, they receive poorer service quality and they find it difficult to date.

I spoke about the job opportunities, lower wages and poorer service quality before.  Today, I’ll tackle the dating bit.  I do acknowledge that it’s a lot harder for fat people to find a date and they face rejection a lot more often than those of a healthy weight.  They’re frequently insulted about their appearance and have to put up with disrespect.

I don’t agree with the way some douches treat them.  If they’re not attracted to fat people, let them down nicely.  Even if they need to mention that it’s due to their weight, it’s fine.  What is unacceptable is calling them all sorts of demeaning names and downright humiliating them.

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On the flip-side, there’re times when the fat people reveal the very reason they find it so difficult to score dates.  They have ridiculously high standards when they themselves can’t bring as much to the table.  Asking to be treated with respect as a human being is 1 thing (and that’s reasonable).  Demanding the skies when they aren’t that much of a catch is quite another.

There’re reasons the hot dudes and dudettes that these fat people want to date won’t consider them.  Like what I stated in the entry about my fat exes, our lifestyles just didn’t gel.  Eventually, I felt trapped in a relationship and life I didn’t want.  It was then that I wrote off dating fat men.

The same goes for fat women.  Yes, it seems insulting to them that they have to lower their standards.  But they need to do some self-examination.  What else can they bring to the table, besides their looks?  What can they do to encourage attraction from the opposite sex?

Food for thought.

Wishing you fun,

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0Gluttony and activity in 1 weekend!

So last Saturday, we met up with K, Cherry and my niece for dinner.  After 3 months away, my man was keen to give them a treat.  We dressed for an al fresco seafood dinner at Changi.  Whilst waiting for K to pick us up, we whiled away the time by taking photos of each other 😛

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The weather is like a furnace right now with intermittent storms, so once again, I chose a cropped top in a very lightweight knit, paired with floral skorts : )  Anything thicker or longer and I would probably wither away from the heat and humidity!

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After I kicked off my shoes, it was his turn.  He was doing the cliched pose with hands placed at the waist.  We had fun trying out the different poses I suggested.  Finally, he declared that he liked this one!

K picked us up and we headed to Changi, but it was helluva crowded and there were no parking spaces, alas : (  We decided to have dinner at Canton Paradise, located at the basement of Katong I12 instead.  We ordered so much food, it was ridiculous!  We had no idea the portion sizes were that huge!!!

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Sharks’ cartilage soup with shrimp dumplings and bok choy

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Stirfried venison with onions

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A whole roasted duck

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Stirfried garoupa slices with spring onions

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A medium seafood hor fun, which, although it looks smaller here, could feed 7 to 8 people!

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Cherry and I shared the 3-egg Chinese spinach, since the guys and Noe wouldn’t touch it.

The food was way too much.  We forced ourselves to finish it and ended up moaning and groaning all the way to the car.  Because we ate so much on Saturday night, my man and I decided to get more exercise the next day.  In the morning, we walked to collect something from Cherry.

Next, we headed to the market to buy some food and groceries.  The final destination was to the supermart for a fresh fish.  We then went home to cook the fish for lunch.  The total time spent walking?  An hour and 20 minutes.  After a nap, I power walked over to my parents’ to visit my sick relative.

That was another 40 minutes.  All in all, I did 2 hours worth of walking on Sunday!  And the huge basketball which was my belly after dinner on Saturday?  Behold……..

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Gone!  The flat tummy came back : )

So leading an active life really makes a difference in one’s weight.  If you really want it, you can achieve it.  C’mon, just do it already!

Wishing you fun,

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I have a spine injury, a beach ready body and no excuse

Abby Pell landed in hot water in early 2015 when she posted stunning photos of her toned-as-hell stomach with the caption, “I have a 6 pack and no excuse”.  Next to her was her adorable daughter, pointing at her washboard tummy and looking shocked.  Out came the claws as the fat feminists tore Abby Pell to shreds online.

The fabulously fit mother clarified that she wasn’t fat shaming anyone.  Like Maria Kang before her, Abby Pell was only looking to inspire mothers to maintain their healthy lifestyles after delivering their precious bundles.  Is there anything wrong?  Not at all.  I don’t have a body like hers but oddly, I don’t feel shamed in the slightest.

A horrific auto accident which sent the car I was in spinning and left the rear right passenger door crumbled also resulted in a spine injury from which I never recovered.  The pain means I can’t lift heavy the way these fitness professionals advocate.  However, it isn’t an excuse to not at least try my level best to be active.

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Like all normal women, I have a full-time job and other matters which take up a lot of my time.  I’ve described these before in past entries, so I won’t bore you by rehashing all those details.  Anyway, gym visits are embarrassingly rare – once a month at most – and that’s when my man and I have a weekend getaway and have time to visit the hotel gym 😛

Yes, I can’t do many strenuous activities that I used to love.  I can’t play basketball.  I can’t roller blade in case I fall and hurt my spine even more.  I can’t go kayaking with friends.  But I can swim (slowly :P) at the pool below my condo or at the swimming club of which I’m a member.  I can power walk at the park or just about anywhere.

These activities are FREE.  Even using a public pool doesn’t cost much.  And with a relatively flat stomach, I can wear a bikini or sexy swimsuit and be bloody confident.  That’s because I worked for this body and the spine injury wasn’t an excuse to lead a less quality life.

There is no excuse to be fat.  If we want something enough, we will find ways around any limitations.  What’s your excuse?

Wishing you fun,

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#realbeauty – fashion is for everyone!

When I speak with bigger sized women, 1 of their concerns is that it’s difficult for them to find clothes they look good in.  In Asia, at least, fat acceptance (now disguised as ‘body positivity’) is less rampant, although more outspoken women are now advocating body confidence after coming into contact with the toxic body positive movement.

By ‘toxic’, I’m referring to the fatlogic lies some of the body positive activists spread, not the movement as a whole.  Although our obesity levels are still manageable and nowhere as uncontrollable as the west, the fact is, they are still rising (at a thankfully much slower level).

Because Asia, on the whole, is more sensible when it comes to maintaining a healthy weight, it is still more difficult for overweight women to find clothes they feel comfortable and look good in.  Our societies are less regressive than those which have embraced body positivity aka fat acceptance.

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Here’s where I agree with the plus size ladies.  I’m happy to see more retailers offering variety for overweight shoppers because they still need to dress up for work.  Previously, these hefty women could only choose from the most dowdy and frumpy designs which don’t flatter them in the slightest.

Retailers are starting to acknowledge this burgeoning market and catering to it.  I see some really stylish fashions for the plus size shoppers and feel happy for them.  They should feel good about themselves rather than resign themselves to looking like retired grandmothers (with all due respect to grandmothers, please).

Heavy women might not want to invest time and effort to lead a healthy lifestyle and maintain a healthy weight, but it doesn’t mean they don’t wish to be well groomed.  Well, not all of them want to be slobs anyway.  Some of them take very good care of their appearance, like their skin and hair!

So you know what?  I’m glad that big sized women now have a wider variety of clothes to choose from.  I hope it helps them develop more confidence.

Wishing you fun,

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