Why fit shaming shouldn’t affect anyone

Next to fat shaming, there have been complaints about skinny shaming and fit shaming.  Surprise, surprise, slender women, women of healthy weight and fit women can feel equally hurt by horrid remarks aimed at their bodies.  But does it really matter?

My view is similar to what I say to fat women.  We can only be shamed if we allow ourselves to feel shame.  We can only be shamed if we don’t have sufficient confidence.  We can only be shamed if we allow somebody else’s opinion to affect us.  We can’t control the world, but we can control ourselves and our reactions.

During a buffet lunch with colleagues, some of them remarked that I was very disciplined.  Not all of them said it in a very friendly way.  Did I allow them to stop me?  Did I stuff myself till I couldn’t breathe deliberately to prove them wrong?  Nope.  I ate till I was comfortably full.  Besides, I was in a bodycon dress.  I didn’t want my stomach to resemble a football at the time.

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Some women told me that I shouldn’t be thinner because it wouldn’t look good.  Eventually, they confessed that they didn’t like taking photos with me because it made them feel fat.  Knowing why they make the comments they do is enough for me to completely disregard them as irrelevant.  Their confidence isn’t my responsibility.  Mine is my responsibility.

Was I offended?  In all honesty, no.  Unless somebody harps on and on about my food intake, a comment here and there isn’t enough to make me fume.  Even if I do get annoyed, it’s only for a short while.  The comments won’t cause me to change my habits since they serve me very well.

So this is my encouragement to skinny and fit women – you do you.  People will have opinions, whether we like them or not.  What is important is that you feel good about yourselves.  We can choose to be confident or let body image issues consume us entirely.  It is all up to you.  I wish you the very best.

Wishing you fun,

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