Jes Baker and that obnoxious entitlement attitude

When I first read Jes Baker’s blog, I thought that she was doing a good thing by promoting body positivity.  Fat women shouldn’t be crying themselves to sleep every night nor should they be afraid to step out of their houses.  They shouldn’t endanger their health by taking extreme measures in order to lose the weight.  They deserve basic human respect like any stranger.

And then I read the post where she gave tips to fat people flying.  The comfort bits were pretty ok, and then came the part where I objected.  She said, if the heavyweights need to take up part of the seat belonging to the passenger beside them, they should inject some humour by saying, “Hope you like cuddling!”  No.  Just no.  Either buy a second seat or live with the discomfort for a few hours.

These fat activists think that they can take away the right of a passenger to their seat when they paid the full price for it.  If I pay for a seat, I expect to have the whole seat space to myself.  And whilst a cuddle is nice with close ones, I don’t particularly enjoy body contact with strangers, let alone cuddling.  Don’t try to put a positive spin on what you’re essentially doing – taking up space that is rightfully mine and which I paid for.


I’m not being unkind, but there is a limit to my patience and support.  Your family might cater to your demands.  Your friends and colleagues might cater to your demands.  Some strangers and companies might cater to your demands.  But you have no right to expect EVERYONE ELSE to cater to your demands.  I may be nice, but don’t expect me to bend over backwards to cater to you, all under the guise of ‘compassion’, ‘kindness’ and ’empathy’.

I cannot empathise with your flesh overflowing into my seat, because I make damn well sure that mine doesn’t flow into yours.  I cannot empathise with your sweat sullying my clean clothes because I make damn well sure that mine doesn’t touch yours and I stay within the boundaries which I paid for.  For that particular period – whether it’s a movie, flight or sports game – that seat space is mine.

So cut out that entitled attitude.  If enough fat people subscribe to it, it’ll only irritate those who aren’t fat shamers by nature to the point where resentment overrides any previous support and sympathy felt towards the heavyweights.  Stop.  It.  Now.

Wishing you fun,



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